Couples Therapy in Pasadena
Emotionally Focused Therapy and couples EMDR for partners who keep landing in the same argument, and want to find their way back to each other.
Pasadena, CA · LCSW · Certified EFT Couples Therapist · Couples EMDR
You know the pattern. Changing it is the hard part.
Maybe the fight always circles back to the same place. One of you reaches, the other pulls away, and somewhere in the middle the real issue gets lost. You can name the cycle (you might even watch it happen in real time) and still feel powerless to stop it.
Most of the couples I work with aren't here because they've stopped loving each other. They're tired. The distance crept in slowly, and now small things land harder than they should.
Couples therapy here isn't about learning to argue more politely. It's about the fears and needs that sit underneath the conflict, and about helping you feel seen and understood by each other again, which is where reconnection actually begins.
The WorkHow I work with Couples
Emotionally Focused Therapy
EFT is a structured, well-researched approach to couples work. Together we slow the cycle down, name what each of you actually feels underneath the conflict, and rebuild the kind of responsiveness that makes you feel like a team again.
Couples EMDR
When old wounds (betrayals, losses, the things that happened long before you met) keep hijacking the present, EMDR can help. I bring it directly into couples work, so the past stops quietly running the relationship.
Queer, polyamorous, intercultural, and neurodivergent couples
I work with relationships of every shape: two partners or more, monogamous or not. Queer and LGBTQ+, polyamorous and open, interracial and intercultural, interfaith, first-generation, neurodivergent. Your relationship doesn't have to fit a template for this work to fit you.
Rebuilding TrustInfidelity counseling and affair recovery
Couples come in for all kinds of reasons: a slow drift into feeling like roommates, a fading of physical and sexual intimacy, an affair. Rebuilding trust after infidelity is some of the hardest work couples do, and some of the most common. A betrayal doesn't only break trust; it can leave the hurt partner with trauma responses: hypervigilance, intrusive images, a nervous system that won't stand down.
We work with both partners: the one rebuilding trust and the one rebuilding safety. When the pain of a betrayal keeps firing faster than words can keep up, I can bring EMDR into the work so those reactions settle at the root, something few couples therapists offer.
What We AddressInfidelity and betrayal trauma
Trauma that predates the relationship
Triggers and flashbacks that derail closeness
Feeling stuck despite doing everything “right”
Who I work withSigns you might need couples therapy
You keep having the same fight in different clothes
You feel more like roommates than partners
You're rebuilding after an affair or broken trust
Emotional and physical closeness has faded
One or more of you is neurodivergent
You're an intercultural or first-generation relationship
You're deciding whether to stay together
Premarital counseling in Los Angeles
Not every couple arrives with something to repair. Premarital counseling is some of the most useful work I do: before patterns harden, we practice the conversations a marriage is actually built on, including conflict, money, family, intimacy, and what closeness means to each of you.
I bring the same EFT foundation to premarital work as to everything else, whatever shape your relationship takes. Whether you're engaged, planning to be, or simply serious about doing this well, we build the habits now that you'll lean on later.
"Rarely, if ever, are any of us healed in isolation. Healing is an act of communion."
— Bell Hooks
Working TogetherYou are the experts on your relationship
I won't take sides, and I won't hand you a script. My job is to help you both get grounded enough to be honest—then to make sense of what comes up so it can actually shift.
We move at the pace your nervous systems can handle. There's no prize for rushing this.
My work is collaborative and anti-oppressive. That means I pay attention to the larger forces (culture, family, identity, the expectations you each grew up inside) that show up in the room whether we name them or not. You set the direction; I help you find the words for what's been hard to say.
Getting StartedHow to begin couples therapy
01
Reach out
Book a consultation or send a note through the consultation form. I reply within 48 hours.
02
A free consultation
We’ll have a brief phone call so you can ask questions, get a feel for how I work, and decide if it feels like a good fit.
03
Your first session
We begin. The first few sessions focus on understanding your history, your goals, and what’s happening in your life right now.
FAQCommon questions about couples therapy
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EFT is a structured, well-researched approach to couples work built around attachment: the human need to feel close and secure with the person who matters most. Instead of teaching communication tricks, we slow down the cycle you get stuck in and work with the emotions underneath it, which is what tends to create lasting change. I practice EFT as a Certified Emotionally Focused Couples Therapist through ICEEFT, the international certifying body for the model.
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Yes. When one or both of you carries trauma that keeps surfacing in the relationship, I can weave EMDR into our work so the old material settles instead of driving the present.
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It can, though usually not by teaching you to argue more politely. Most communication problems aren't really about the words; they're about what gets triggered underneath when you feel unseen by your partner. We work at that level, and the communication tends to ease once the fear driving it does.
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Yes, I work with queer and LGBTQ+ partners; polyamorous, open, and non-monogamous relationships; intercultural and first-generation couples; and neurodivergent partnerships. You don't have to explain or justify the shape of your relationship here.
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Premarital counseling is structured couples work before marriage: a place to practice how you handle conflict, money, family, intimacy, and expectations before those patterns set. Mine is grounded in EFT, and it's for any couple planning a life together, whether or not a wedding is involved.
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Sessions run 50 minutes, usually weekly to start. Consistency helps while we're building momentum and trust. Some couples come for a few months around a specific rough patch; others stay longer for deeper work. We'll talk openly about what makes sense for you.
Reaching out is the hardest part
Book a free 20-minute consultation and we'll take it from there.
Couples therapy in Pasadena, South Pasadena, Sierra Madre, Eagle Rock, Highland Park & online across California